Reasons I Can't Run {or walk} a Ragnar

My ward is putting together a team for the Cape Cod Ragnar and they really want me to join up with them. They want me to join so much that they offered to let me walk. Now, don't get me wrong I would love to go along on this adventure, bond with the ladies in my ward and see a few new sights along the way but I do not have any interest in running. Ever. At all. For any reason. I can do about 20 minutes on the elliptical at my apartment's gym but I do not want to run/walk 11.4 miles of this race.

I am not sure how to tell them no but here are a list of excuses I am working on:

1. This is basically me working out:

2. Registration is $110. This may not seem like very much but it doesn't include gas, food, workout clothes, shoes, socks that won't give me blisters etc. I foresee this costing me about $200 in reality. $200=£119 or €146 which brings me to my next couple of points.

3. We will be leaving for Europe exactly one week after the Ragnar. I have a list a mile long (get it) of things I want to do and buy while I am there and I would rather spend my money on a caricature of myself in front of the Eiffel Tower than running. This just seems like an obvious one to me.

4. I am already asking for 2 whole weeks off of work (see number 3) and I don't know how much my boss will love if I ask for another day off just a week before I disappear to France. These copies won't make themselves!
Did I mention that my boss' wife is the one trying to convince me to join the team? Luckily my boss thinks running a Ragnar is just as insane as I do.

5. I will most likely have to run walk by myself in the middle of the night. As much as being attacked by a rabid possum seems like all my dreams coming true, I think I could do without it. Hasn't anyone seen the Teen Girl Squad episode on Homestarrunner.com where the girl gets possum'd? Um, no thanks.

6. I hate to run. I calculated that it would take me over 3 hours to do my legs of the race. I would gladly ballroom dance for 3 hours or strap on the old toe shoes and do barre work and turns for 3 hours but running? Yuck.

In all truth it does seem like it could be a really fun weekend if it weren't for the running. The team has been wearing me down for months now but I just don't think it's going to happen.